Life is funny!

It never seems to go the way we plan.

Often it behaves like a petulant child, acting as though it’s developed a conscious far removed from our own, determined to do exactly the opposite of whatever it was we’d intended.

As a child, I had my life all mapped out. I spent countless hours planning all aspects, from the type of person I’d marry, to how many children I’d have and their names, to the design of my house, my job, my pets.

Problem was, life wasn’t gracious enough to follow my Master Plan.

Sometimes, I believe it simply never got my memos, perhaps due to a glitch in my internal interoffice memo distribution system; sometimes, I think it veered in different directions because it thought my grand scheme was boring or constrictive and thus in serious need of revamping.

In any case, there’s been many a time when I’ve found myself at various forks, trying to decide whether to go down Path A (which would have run inline with where my Master Plan was to take me) or Path B (which would have led me along the opposite course). There were even times when I found myself not wanting to take either and to just forge a new one that landed somewhere happily down the middle.

Whether I made the right choices or not is still up for debate. I suppose that it could potentially be argued well after my death. “If only she’d done this”, “if only she’d done that.” Still, I do not regret my choices.

Life is too short to waste even a moment floundering in the murky waters of regret. I made what felt were the best decisions . . . and they’ve led me here. ‘Here’ may not be where I expected to be but I’m not entirely convinced it’s not where I shouldn’t have gone all along.

I haven’t lived a life of wealth but I’ve been comfortable. Comfortable enough that I’ve been able to, on occasion, help out a friend or loved one when they’ve been in need.

I haven’t found true love but I’ve known the love of family and friends. I’ve known what it’s like to make a difference and to matter in someone’s world.

I haven’t had children but I’ve been honored to be called ‘aunt’ by several wonderful human beings and to have been blessed with a foster child, in an overseas country.

I haven’t gotten the white-picket fence lifestyle but, then again, did I really, truly want it? Fences not only keep out things you may potentially want to let in but the darn things need to be constantly painted to keep them white and pristine. In reflection, if I had the choice to spend a few precious moments painting another coat on a darned fence in order to keep up its appearances or to spend that time with a loved one, I’d always choose the latter?

My point is, life is a series of choices. We all have to make them. Do we take this job offer or that one? Do we live here or there? Do we stay close to home or move far away? Do we stay in touch or do we choose to let go?

Choices.

Each one changes the makeup of who we are, of who we are destined to become.

If wealth and status are important to you, for example, then that’s where you need to concentrate your efforts.

If, however, helping others and leaving this world a better place than when you came into it is important, then investing your time into endeavors aimed at netting big profits is probably not the direction you want to go.

For me, making a difference would always take precedence.

I’d rather drive an older vehicle so I’m able to donate money to my foster child than drive a nicer one and know that somewhere, someone is being negatively impacted by that decision. No, I can’t help all them but I can help one and if someone else helped one and someone else helped one then, together, we could make a huge change on the face of poverty, during our lifetime.

To my way of thinking, that makes the most sense. We could collect material possessions until our homes are overflowing with them but they are not leaving this earth with us. Or, we could take the money we would have invested into those things and do something for someone that will not only make an impact on that person but also that person’s family, potentially for generations to come. In so doing, we live on vicariously through them. Our footprints carry on down life’s paths long after we’ve departed this world.

Which brings us back to the original topic. Life is funny.

I say that because if you had consulted with me in my teens or my twenties, helping others may not have taken precedence over the material possessions dream. That was because I hadn’t yet lived a life where I’d witnessed good people, working hard, sometimes working two or more jobs, to support their families and to give them a decent life.

I would not have had a connection with homelessness or empathized with those who find themselves in that situation.

I would not have had an understanding of what it was like to not know how you are going to pay your bills or how you are going to put food in your cupboards.

Thanks to the fact that life has led me down some windy and unexpected paths, I’ve been exposed to these issues and many others that I would not have encountered had I been travelling that clear-cut, more planned-out route.

Through deviations and detours, I’ve met a man who had five potentially terminal conditions, including AIDS and cancer. I had a chance to hear his story and feel his despair over the fact that the people he loved and thought would be there for him were the first ones to turn away when they learned of his illnesses.

And, I gained deeper compassion.

I’ve met single parents fighting to provide the best for their children, struggling to keep them fed, clothed and educated.

Through that, I gained a profound understanding of love.

I’ve had a chance to be educated about conditions in other countries.

Through that, I learned to appreciate more all the ‘givens’ we are blessed with in my own country.

I’ve watched exposes on human trafficking and other forms of abuse. I’ve further researched both topics for various writing projects.

Through that, I learned of the true meaning of sorrow as well as been awed at what a wonderful life I’ve led, even if I did it a little poorer and a little different than I’d expected.

I’ve been educated to the fact that life is not always rosy. That even when we think of ourselves as hard-done-by, often we are better off than that majority of the people sharing the space on this same ball of earth.

I’ve experienced the heartbreaking effects of terminal and degenerative diseases. Saw how these conditions impact all, regardless of income level and status. There is no discrimination when it comes to Alzheimers, for example. Yet, there is a preciousness to these diseases too that allows those living through them or with someone afflicted by them to appreciate more not only the one affected but all those whom they love.

Life is funny.

Sometimes the paths we would have chosen not to travel, the ones that were littered with brambles and fallen branches, are the ones that provide the most enlightening and wondrous journey.

Perhaps, we all need to be more open to the idea that, regardless of what paths we think we should take, we should always be aware that something better may be waiting just around the corner. Just because that path initially seems dark and gloomy, just because it may have potholes and ruts, does not mean it’s a path we should avoid.

Sometimes, to really enjoy the journey we need to just throw away the map . . . and the compass too. Sometimes, we need to travel down roads with no destination in mind, just being open to any and every possibility.

Sometimes, we just need to get lost to truly find our way.

The trip doesn’t always have to be planned to be successful. It only needs to be a new adventure that leaves us feeling as though we’ve gained something worthwhile by the time we reach the end of it.

Life may be funny–or it may just be fun. It all depends on what paths we choose to journey down.